A few months ago wormwood absinthe was legalized for sale in the US. Now instead of hiding away in the Czech Republic, Baudelaire groupies and “The Perfect Drug” fans could openly sip the green fairy in a few reputable New York City lounges. Employees Only (fear not the psychic in the window–walk on by and through the velvet drapes) has the kind of high-class, speakeasy-inspired vibe ideal for quaffing vaguely-illicit substances. But Art Deco touches and Jazz Age tunes aside, the artistically mixed and presented cocktails are the big draw there.

My bartender charmingly answered all my questions about absinthe, despite teasingly asking if I was a cop. At Employees Only, instead of merely diluting the absinthe by dripping water over a sugar cube, they light the sugar on fire, which adds a carmelized flavor as well as a dramatic flair to the drink. He thought that the absinthe sold in the US still lacked a few ingredients one can find in their foreign counterparts, and although it is strong (about 120-140 proof), its hallucinogenic effects are much exaggerated. The “real stuff”–his eyes darted to a glass liquor cabinet–cannot be “sold,” he said carefully.

I wanted to try straight absinthe, but being a bourbon fan I opted for the billionaire cocktail–Baker’s Bourbon shaken with lemon juice, grenadine and absinthe bitters. The bitters are made in-house and stored in a glowing green stoppered bottle with “absinthe” etched on the side–how I coveted that bottle. My drink was strong and delicious, the bourbon tempered by grenadine, and the bitters adding a slight licorice kick. This probably ranks equally with the 19th Street Special at Death & Co. as my favorite bourbon drink.

The cocktails, at $15 bucks a pop, are expensive, and there’s only one bathroom in the joint, so my stay was a short one. But I’ll definitely be back next year for another buzz-inducing happy birthday beverage, (or possibly much sooner).

Employees Only 510 Hudson St. behind the psychic

So the realization that the holidays are here again has seeped into your consciousness like slush through the tops of your shoes, and you decide you need a drink. More specifically, you need to drink without looking like you’re enjoying it too much, because you’re not doing the Christmas spirit thing this year. Maybe you’re feeling the drain on your wallet, or the strain of coworker vacations; maybe you resent kids, and the Victorian-era impulse that made Christmas all about THEM. Maybe you used to have nightmares about Santa Claus. I mean, you were only five but you still knew that a strange man coming to your house at night bearing gift-wrapped rewards for your “good behavior” sounded too good to be true.

Whatever the reason, Bah Humbug Christmas Ale is a decent beer for the job. While the label clearly defines your outward stance toward any yuletide cheer, this malty, reddish-brown ale has hints of holiday spices that are actually enjoyable. Despite being a “winter” beer, the taste is subtle and surprisingly light. One bottle goes down easily and leaves you with just a little bit of a toasty glow–but no one has to know.

Bah Humbug Christmas Ale from Wychwood Brewery ($5.50)
Available at Dual Specialty Store 91 First Ave. at 6th Street.

It’s actually Abraço, and I think it’s destined to be my favorite neighborhood coffee spot. I wandered in this morning, too weak and poor to amble much farther than (good god) Dunkin’ Donuts, and instantly my day started looking up. The barista, a cheerful, lanky dude with a mop of gray hair (I think this could only be Jamie), poured me a polished cappuccino. The espresso ($3) tasted a little less mellow than 9th Street’s, more slap-you-in-the face, but was very good, and topped with leafy foam art. While I waited, I was swayed into ordering zeppole–two fried-to-order balls of light, doughnut-like ricotta, rolled in sugar ($3). The standing-only space holds two narrow bars just wide enough for coffee cups, so the folks eating in were either chatting or just drinking coffee–no newspapers, laptops, or cell phones. But ambiance aside (Abraço is Portuguese for “hug”), this cafe’s secret weapon is that it has an actual cook, so instead of a display case of muffins there’s a whole rotating lunch menu to explore, complete with grilled cheese panini and a deliciously light, eggy frittata.

The only downside is that Abraço is sure to be popular, so I’ll have to get my happy tropicalia coffee fix early to beat the rush.

Abraço Espresso, 86 E. 7th St., at First Ave. 8 am - 8 pm, Sun. 9 am - 8 pm.

1. The typical signs: pallid complexion, red nose, bitten fingernails, shiny dress shoes.

2. May also be scurrying somewhere in wrinkly business attire clutching resume.

3. Or buying Kleenex and beer at the deli with loose change.

3. Or carrying a jingly coffee can in the vicinity of a Coinstar machine.

4. Will certainly not be haunting favorite snacking destinations but may be hard at work on a self-pitying blog post.

Approach with caution, as this individual may be both highly contagious and extremely pissy.